A prayer

I'm not strong enough to resist being without him, God. And I'm not sure I could recover if he walked away one more time. It would hurt twice as much than it did the first time around. Protect me, Father. Don't let me love him again if it isn't forever. I've already waited over 20 years to find this love again-will he give it another chance?
God, I can't do this alone. I can't stop loving him. I can't change him, but I can't let him give up either. Neither will You let him give up on me. I will never give up on him or our love.

And speaking of Proverbs....

Proverbs 27
1 Boast not thyself of to morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth. 2 Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth; a stranger, and not thine own lips. 3 A stone is heavy, and the sand weighty; but a fool's wrath is heavier than them both. 4 Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy? 5 Open rebuke is better than secret love. 6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. 7 The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet. 8 As a bird that wandereth from her nest, so is a man that wandereth from his place. 9 Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel. 10 Thine own friend, and thy father's friend, forsake not; neither go into thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity: for better is a neighbour that is near than a brother far off. 11 My son, be wise, and make my heart glad, that I mayanswer him that reproacheth me. 12 A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished. 13 Take his garment that is surety for a stranger, and take a pledge of him for a strange woman. 14 He that blesseth his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it shall be counted a curse to him. 15 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. 16 Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself. 17 Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend. 18 Whoso keepeth the fig tree shall eat the fruit thereof: so he that waiteth on his master shall be honoured. 19 As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man. 20 Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied. 21 As the fining pot for silver, and the furnace for gold; so is a man to his praise. 22 Though thou shouldest bray a fool in amortar among wheat with a pestle, yet will not his foolishness depart from him. 23 Be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks, and look well to thy herds. 24 For riches are not for ever: and doth the crown endure to every generation? 25 The hay appeareth, and the tender grass sheweth itself, and herbs of the mountains are gathered. 26 The lambs are for thy clothing, and the goats are the price of the field. 27 And thou shalt have goats' milk enough for thy food, for the food of thy household, and for the maintenance for thy maidens .

Proverbs and Sayings

A little help is better than a lot of pity- Celtic Proverb

Man has a thousand plans, Heaven but one-Chinese Proverb

The eye never forgets what the heart has seen-Bantu Proverb

One meets his/her destiny often on the road he/she takes to avoid it
-French Proverb

We will find the things they say can't be found

I say "What about that Valentine's Weekend at Travelodge?
He says "Well I remember it fondly"
Then he says "We started a life there"
And I say "Well that's the one thing we got."

God is the owner, Jesus is your Coach. The Holy Spirit, the apostles and angels are in your home court-Pastor Matthew Barnett

If you love me, come find me
If you love me you will be here with me

All I see is you,all I need is you- I never want this feeling to go away.

Song Stuck in My head

The song stuck in my head is Far Away by Nickelback. I always try not to cry when I hear it. I really want to dance to it with the man I love.

I finally saw The Notebook. It was such a good movie!! Now I'm thinking that I need to read the book and watch the movie over about 6 more times!! It so reminds me of how I was when I was in love when I was 17(and 3 years before that) and still in love with that same man even now. I would very much like to watch it with him soon. Get his opinion on it. :)

Update

Well I have finally gotten a divorce from Eric. It was final December 12th. Now the rest of my life can begin.